#10 What If This Could Be Awesome!?

Chang your own reality

Hola Amigos y Amigas!

It’s been a week of incredible weather in Austin! I’ve put up Chinese couplets 春聯 and lots of year of the rabbit decorations to celebrate the upcoming Chinese New Year at the end of January. CNY is the most important holiday for family to get together (equivalent to Christmas here), so making our apartment feel like home means so much to me!

It’s amazing how a $15 box of Amazon can really bring Taiwan to Austin pretty successfully!

“What if this could be awesome?”

As I’m approaching the end of pregnancy, I am having lots of FOMO. I want to live fully before we welcome our baby girl to our family. I want to have it all. Work hard on a kick-ass freelance project, write a lot, and make more art while having lots of hangouts with friends, an abundance of alone time, and feeling rested every day.

With only 24 hours a day, my desire to have it all was, as you can tell, impossible. When I worked hard, I regretted not taking long walks by myself. When I hung out with friends, I thought I could have used this time to write or paint. I was upset no matter what I was doing.

On Sunday, my body wanted to rest but I had already scheduled a meetup with a friend I’d wanted to see for a long time, a hangout with some friends with kids, Capoeria practice, and a date night for Paul and me at an excellent Japanese restaurant on South Congress, the iconic street in Austin.

Looking at my schedule, my body felt tense. My shoulders were tight. There was a dark, heavy cloud weighing over me, and man, I was mad at myself. I started to imagine how much the day would suck and predicted that I would not be happy at the end of the day.

In the morning, I started to fantasize about all the things that could “accidentally” come up so I could make an excuse to stay at home and rest. Of course, nothing happened. Sixty minutes before I could text my new friend, I decided this has to stop. I know cancelling my appointment wouldn’t help with improving my FOMO.

“I” have to change.

“Wtf, man, I didn’t learn NLP for nothing!”

I sat down, closed my eyes, and started to ask myself the same question every time I get overwhelmed by future.

“What if this day could be AWESOME?”

I practice seeing myself having so much fun meeting this new friend and playing with the cute kiddos of our friends. I could feel a strong wave of energy flowing through me during my Capoeira practice, hearing the music of the Brazilian instrument playing. I saw myself enjoying quality time and deep conversation at dinner with my husband, and walking down South Congress hand-in-hand with lots of warm hugs and kisses.

I saw myself go to bed amazed by how awesome the day went, falling asleep with a smile.

This process of envisioning a different future took less than 5 mins. But in this short time, my body turned from tight, closed-up, and small, to relaxed, excited, and expanding. I opened my eyes. I no longer dreaded the day ahead. I was looking forward to it.

And the reality? The day happened exactly as I envisioned it! It was freaking awesome!

I think what’s effective about NLP is that it doesn’t just tell us, “Everything will be fine,” or to, "think from the bright side.” It actually guides us to embed our five senses in that future, looking out from our eyes, listening to the sounds from our ears, and feeling the temperature of the air on our skin in that AWESOME future. By changing our bodily sensations, our thought patterns can shift, which leads to a different set of behaviors to shape a different reality.

Next time, if you feel stressed or are trapped in your “worst case scenarios” brain, try asking yourself, “What if this could be awesome?” and really embed yourself in that possibility. You might notice your reality will start to shift, too.

I’ll end today’s newsletter with a poem (I heard from Tara Brach’s guided meditation)

"Ten thousand flowers in Spring,
The moon in Autumn,
A cool breeze in Summer,
Snow in Winter.
If your mind isn't clouded by unnecessary things,
This is the best season of your life."
-- Wu-men

See ya next week!

Angie